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TehBamski@lemmy.world to Ask Lemmy@lemmy.world · 1 year ago

What statistic about yourself would you desire the most to know?

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What statistic about yourself would you desire the most to know?

TehBamski@lemmy.world to Ask Lemmy@lemmy.world · 1 year ago
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  • Hobart_the_GoKart@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    I’ve really fantasized about being able to view my stats after I die. I come back to word counts pretty often. Or how many “near misses” I’ve had, if any I suppose.

    • DrMango@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Holy shit I thought I was the only one. I’ve thought about this for decades! I think it would be so cool to have access to and comprehension of an omniscient record of my life after I die.

      How many liters of urine did I expel? How many birds have I seen? What is my most used word? How many miles have I traveled? The data is endless!

      • HonoraryMancunian@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        What is my most used word?

        The

        • gothic_lemons@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Nah pretty sure my would be uuummmm

      • Hobart_the_GoKart@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Yes yes yes! All these trivial things that I will look up and say “Neat!”. My heaven is pretty simple haha

      • pdxfed@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        deleted by creator

  • potterpockets@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    Number of times people have masturbated to me.

    (Spoiler: it’s zero)

    • GentlemanLoser@ttrpg.network
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      1 year ago

      Not anymore 🤤

      • Victor@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Me next?

    • KammicRelief@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      but how do you know?!?

  • Psychadelligoat@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 year ago

    How much splooge I’ve nutted in whatever the funniest whole unit could be

    • ADHDefy@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      My suggestions for units of measurements, in no specific order:

      • Thimbles
      • Water balloons
      • Per hoppus foot
      • Cord and rick
      • Burlap potato sacks
      • Waffle irons
      • Size 11 wooden clogs
      • Drums
      • Silos
      • Minecarts
      • Blimps/zeppelins
      • Potential babies
      • A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        You’ve nutted 397,405 times the total earth population last year. *

        ~measured as per sperm, not by volume or weight~

    • TehBamski@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      Are you by any chance the cum box dude?

      • ADHDefy@kbin.social
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        1 year ago

        Oh dear, I was hoping that one would die with reddit.

        • TehBamski@lemmy.worldOP
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          1 year ago

          Well, it became internet history years ago. So… unless you want to spend your one chance to change history on the removal of the cum box story, I don’t see any other way. Haha

    • BrianTheeBiscuiteer@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I’m thinking teaspoons.

  • Rocky60@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    How many times I’ve gotten out of a comfortable sitting position to let my dog in

    • cheese_greater@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      In Soviet Russia, Bear-that-ate-dog lets YOU in!

  • andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    Disk, RAM, CPU and GPU usage stats compared to other people. I suppose a lot of them are built like proper servers with their good memory while I can’t remember jack shit, like information from RAM never get stored.

  • HubertManne@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    my massive massive penis length. But not how female I am. or how much of a liar I am.

    • ADHDefy@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      I believe that someday scientists will develop a tool that will be able to accurately measure your gargantuan penis, once we have the technology.

      • HubertManne@kbin.social
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        1 year ago

        I look forward to breaking such a tool with my tool.

    • GONADS125@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Big dicks come with big dick problems.

  • Meowoem@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    Frequency of nice things said about me per year, especially as a ratio of good to bad.

    I’d be fascinated to know what the peek’s correspond to

  • Squirrel@thelemmy.club
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    1 year ago

    If I made bricks out of all the poop I ever pooped out, and built a 6 ft high wall out of the bricks, how long could I make that wall?

    • cheese_greater@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Psssh, such a Squirrel answer🐿️

  • AmosBurton@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    deleted by creator

  • noseatbelt@lemmy.ca
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    1 year ago

    How many times I’ve been right when my husband and I have differing recollections of something.

  • AverageGoob@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Give me my brains S.M.A.R.T stats. I feel something has been rattling up there so feel it’s about time to be replaced.

  • TehBamski@lemmy.worldOP
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    1 year ago

    I would love to know how many websites I’ve visited since I began using the internet.

  • GONADS125@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    I am in the 1% of humans worldwide who can lick their own elbows.

    Please, no autographs…

    Edit: I’m dumb and misread the question. I read it like: “What statistic about yourself do you desire the world to know about?”

  • A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    I just want to know why the only women willing to give me the time of day are mentally unstable abusers.

    also, maybe, how long of a wall 3 foot tall and 6 inches thick could have been made from my total bowel movements.

  • balderdash@lemmy.zip
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    1 year ago

    Total hours spent listening to music. And where I am on the leaderboard lol

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