These past few days, I realized that I essentially have no idea what my husband actually does for a living. I know he’s a businessman and involved in different industries; that’s about it. I guess I was never curious, as long as he brings money home + he doesn’t talk about work when he’s not working. I just don’t really have any interest in business.
My wife doesn’t really know what I do for a living. It isn’t a secret but my job is complicated and my title/ position doesn’t correlate to the work I do. I generally don’t talk about work at home, mostly because the conversation would be so high level it’s meaningless or I would need to give her a 4 hour lecture so she would have the background / framework of whatever the nightmare of the week is. 🤷♂️
In short, no I don’t think so.
What do you do? My work is also complicated, but my wife is smart, and I can even summarize the gist of what I do in simple terms so I can explain it to people of all backgrounds.
Not necessarily bad, but a bit unusual for sure. He presumably spends a solid chunk of his life at work, but never wants to talk about it? For me personally, when I talk about work to people close to me, it’s not so much about explaining what I do specifically, but more about venting frustrations, recalling funny moments, business trips I might have to take etc. Couldn’t imagine just being completely silent about it, but that’s just me I guess.
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Define “nothing”. Are we talking their work schedule? Where they work? Or not even know what their job is?
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I would think it’s a bit odd at least. I know at least that much about my whole social circle
Not weird. My father was in defense before he retired (clearances and all that) and I still don’t know what he did and likely never will. I have a vague guess about it but don’t really know what projects he worked on or even the part of the industry he was involved in. No one in the family does.
If your partner does some secret government funded stuff, then it’s probably better you know nothing about it. Obviously, there could be a cover story about working with tax calculations or something boring like that, but does that count? You would kinda know about the fake job but not about the terminator robot research.
Then again, your partner could also be a psychopath mafia boss and a drug lord who keeps everything secret… might be safer if you don’t know. Or you might want to know so that you can run away. It’s complicated. Would you even survive if you found out? Better not ask.
With normal people though, it’s common to have a pretty good idea about what your partner does for a living. How many people never talk about work stuff at home? Sounds pretty strange to me.
If it is because you’ve never asked: not at all.
If he actively refuses to talk about it: at least a bit weird.
I think it’s a bit weird to never ask.
I cannot answer if it is weird or not because I never valued others’ opinion of my relationships. That said, I would actually find it hurtful if my wife had no interest in my work. My work life consumes a large percentage of my waking moments and it is important to me. If I knew that the depth of her care for such a big part of me is whether or not my paycheck clears, I would feel very hurt. Plus, I would never feel like she’s fully part of my life if I am not able to share such a massive part of it with her. That’s just me, so please do not think that I am anywhere near average on the matter.
I think that if you don’t do the same job at some point in time or have really deep insight in the industry/job, you newer know what he’s doing.
From my work experience I can say that most work tasks I had wasn’t that simple (if I don’t count the “human robot” type summer jobs).
Even some simple sounding job titles hide lot of different tasks most people don’t talk about or even don’t think about.
For example I was brew master in small brewery (3 people including myself) - you would think I was there to only make beer, my boss deals with paperwork, and my colleague is there for maintenance and cleaning. In reality I was more of Jack of all trades - maintanance, planning, cleaning, sanitation, kegging, helped with tasks you wouldn’t think about.
And I think business man covers lots of different tasks that are quite boring so I wouldn’t mind not knowing about them.
Not a dealbreaker, but a good chunk of the indicators on what makes a ‘healthy’ relationship are based around involving your partner in aspects of your life. This does tend to be much more of a negative indicator depending on which role you might play in the relationship, basically might be worse if your roles were reversed. Those are all just generalizations though and no reason you have to check off all the boxes.
Definitely not common though.
If you don’t really have any interest, and it’s not causing any strain between you two, I don’t see why it would be a problem. As long as you’re both happy, then who cares
