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Ek-Hou-Van-Braai@piefed.social to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.worldEnglish · 25 天前

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Ek-Hou-Van-Braai@piefed.social to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.worldEnglish · 25 天前
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  • Annoyed_🦀 @lemmy.zip
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    25 天前

    First one: i analyse sales.

    Second one: i automate production

    Third one: i’m a fucking idiot

    • ApertureUA@lemmy.today
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      25 天前
      1. I
      2. Am
      3. A
      4. Fucking
      5. Idiot

      It doesn’t fit

      • blarghly@lemmy.world
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        25 天前

        Imma fucking idiot

        • fartographer@lemmy.world
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          25 天前

          I know you are, but what I am too, also.

        • HowAbt2day@futurology.today
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          24 天前

          Don’t be like that, Imma.

        • dditty@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          24 天前

          deleted by creator

      • _lilith@lemmy.world
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        25 天前

        well the job is BS so…

      • guy@piefed.social
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        25 天前

        I am idijit

      • x4740N@lemmy.world
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        24 天前

        “I’m Stupid” works

    • Vellaides@lemmy.zip
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      25 天前

      Fourth one: I murder living beings so humans can eat their mutilated corpses

      • 5in1K@lemmy.zip
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        25 天前

        Nom nom nom.

    • zxqwas@lemmy.world
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      25 天前

      Going further with wikipedias article and some of their bullshit jobs listed:

      Telemarketing: I sell stuff.

      Corporare lawyer: I explain law.

      Academic administratrors: I administer students/professors

      Compliance officer: I check compliance.

      • Annoyed_🦀 @lemmy.zip
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        25 天前

        Corporate lawyer would be : i’m an asshole

        • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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          25 天前

          That’s also most lawmakers/politicians/lobbyists

  • Olgratin_Magmatoe@slrpnk.net
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    25 天前

    I write code

    (It’s still a bullshit job)

    • kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world
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      25 天前

      I generate bugs.

      • dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world
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        25 天前

        Honest.

  • Ek-Hou-Van-Braai@piefed.socialOP
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    25 天前

    I make programs

    • Quokka@quokk.au
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      25 天前

      I make problems

      • okwhateverdude@lemmy.world
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        25 天前

        Problems make me.

        • Eager Eagle@lemmy.world
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          25 天前

          student?

          • okwhateverdude@lemmy.world
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            25 天前

            teacher?

      • Axolotl@feddit.it
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        25 天前

        I make bugs

        • hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          25 天前

          The techy kind or the crawly kind?

      • Truscape@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        25 天前

        Practical problems, solve

  • Zozano@aussie.zone
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    25 天前

    3 people above the fisherman:

    • sales analyst
    • automation technician
    • software engineer

    Fisherman:

    • I operate a decentralized, sustainability-focused aquatic-resource acquisition methodology utilizing precision-guided line-and-lure interface systems to facilitate targeted biomass retrieval.
    • Ensign_Crab@lemmy.world
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      24 天前

      I think the meme is saying that if you know your job is bullshit, you obfuscate what you do behind a thick layer of corpospeak.

      • Zozano@aussie.zone
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        24 天前

        Everyone likes to act like they’re more important than they are.

        Ironically the fisherman might actually be worse ethically and ecologically.

        • Ensign_Crab@lemmy.world
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          24 天前

          Everyone likes to act like they’re more important than they are.

          And that impulse is borne out of insecurity.

          • Zozano@aussie.zone
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            24 天前

            Being aware of the system doesn’t make you immune from the system.

            • Ensign_Crab@lemmy.world
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              24 天前

              All it does is convey that the person saying it thinks their job is bullshit and that they’re insecure about it. So they either have impostor syndrome or their job is genuinely bullshit.

    • slampisko@lemmy.world
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      25 天前

      In the OP, all the speech bubbles are answers to “What do you do at your job?” I challenge you to try again with that in mind

      • OneWomanCreamTeam@sh.itjust.works
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        25 天前

        “I press buttons”

        • Zozano@aussie.zone
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          25 天前
          • “I analyse sales”
          • “I automate processes”
          • “I create software”
          • Mossheart@lemmy.ca
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            25 天前

            I appease Machine-spirits.

            • Zozano@aussie.zone
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              24 天前

              Somehow feels less self-immolating than appeasing billionaire-spirits

              • Mossheart@lemmy.ca
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                24 天前

                They’re the same picture.

      • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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        24 天前

        If you ask me what my job is and then you ask for clarification because you don’t know what that job is, those are two separate questions.

        Just because a person does not understand a job does not mean that it’s a BS job. By that logic a cyber security analyst is a BS job. But you would sure as hell would notice if all of them went away.

  • drath@lemmy.world
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    25 天前

    I suck dick

    • Avid Amoeba@lemmy.ca
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      25 天前

      Nice to see you here Mr. President.

    • VitoRobles@lemmy.today
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      25 天前

      Ah, it’s nice to meet another fellow customer service rep.

  • Treczoks@lemmy.world
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    25 天前

    So I either have a bullshit job “I design chips for isosychronous low-latency networks” or a real job “I herd electrons”…

    • icelimit@lemmy.ml
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      25 天前

      You do math.

  • Frezik@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    25 天前

    Is this really the message we want to send?

    Yes, our society makes lots of bullshit jobs. That’s because capitalism can only keep people employed by creating bullshit jobs, and unemployed people are six missed meals away from revolution. That is not the fault of the people who have bullshit jobs.

    And no, I won’t accept “this is just a shitposting sub, lighten up” as a response. This is just another form of kicking down, and it isn’t funny. The working class needs solidarity, not this.

    • VitoRobles@lemmy.today
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      25 天前

      When I first saw this (maybe years ago), it was posted on sites to mock this thinking.

      Yeah, someone believes it to have made this. But yeah, that person sucks.

    • SkyezOpen@lemmy.world
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      Agreed, but I refuse to extend that acceptance to most consultants.

    • angstylittlecatboy@reddthat.com
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      25 天前

      Yeah I really don’t like the “blue collar good tech bad” undertone here

    • rumschlumpel@feddit.org
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      25 天前

      Further reading: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bullshit_Jobs

    • Socialism_Everyday@reddthat.com
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      Yes, our society makes lots of bullshit jobs. That’s because capitalism can only keep people employed by creating bullshit jobs, and unemployed people are six missed meals away from revolution

      Couldn’t be further from reality. Capitalist firms actively hire the least amount of people possible, because if they can get away with equal production and lower number of employees, that means higher profit.

      Capitalism is actually the only system in human history with unemployment: it wasn’t a thing in hunter-gatherer society, it wasn’t a thing in early agricultural societies, it wasn’t a thing during the times of slavery, it wasn’t a thing during feudalism, and it hasn’t been a thing in any communist nation such as Cuba or the USSR (both guaranteeing jobs to every citizen as a right, and the latter having 10% of all positions vacant from 1970 onward).

      Capitalism maintains an unemployed sector of the population because:

      1. Employing more workers costs more money to firms

      2. Having high unemployment decreases wages, improving profits of firms

      3. Having a pool of unemployed people allows firms to spawn, grow and mutate without difficulty of finding workers to do so.

  • merc@sh.itjust.works
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    24 天前

    Is this a war on being specific?

    If a fisherman says “I operate the winch on a bowpicker tuna fishing boat”, is that a bullshit job?

    If a middle-management yes-man who exists only to fluff his boss’ ego describes his job as “I encourage excellence” does that mean his job is no longer bullshit?

    • alyth@lemmy.world
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      24 天前

      “I encourage excellence” - Chef Excellence

    • LumiNocta@lemmy.zip
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      23 天前

      I guide people

      Why is everyone always annoyed at managers?

      • merc@sh.itjust.works
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        23 天前

        A lot of managers are pretty useless. Some degree of management is needed because you can’t just have 10,000 individual contributors all reporting directly to the CEO. But, a lot of managers get where they are by schmoozing, claiming credit, shifting blame, avoiding responsibility, etc.

  • Ginny [they/she]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    I write code. ✔️ Real job.

    I chop down trees. ❌ Bullshit job.

    • Alcoholicorn@mander.xyz
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      24 天前

      I jack lumber.

      • SirQuack@feddit.nl
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        I jack off

    • missfrizzle@discuss.tchncs.de
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      23 天前

      I fell trees!

      you can use “fell” as a transitive verb. it’s a little archaic but sounds cozy.

  • Novamdomum@fedia.io
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    Extreme physical danger of drowning, hypothermia, severe injury, insane hours, unpredictable income, huge mental and emotional stress in an industry that often damages the environment and is plagued with human rights abuses?

    This comic feels like it was written by the fisherman.

    • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
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      Or one of those boomers, who really wanted AI to replace all the intellectual workers, so they either can be stay-at-home mothers or go to “real manly jobs”.

      • phdepressed@sh.itjust.works
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        Yeah as if farmers aren’t using gps guidance climate models soil analysis and gmo/selection etc to try and eke out some profit vs the megacorps.

    • [deleted]@piefed.world
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      25 天前

      This comic looks like it was drawn by the fisherman.

    • hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      I’m pretty sure that it was definitely not made by anyone who’s a fisher.

  • real_squids@sopuli.xyz
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  • Grimy@lemmy.world
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    I am an aquatic resource acquisition specialist leveraging distributed ecosystem monitoring, real-time biological signal analytics, and manual-mechanical retrieval interfaces to optimize biomass extraction.

  • P1k1e@lemmy.world
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    25 天前

    I fix shit

  • da_cow (she/her)@feddit.org
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    24 天前

    • monotremata@lemmy.ca
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      24 天前

      https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=KWotO76SuXE

    • Rolivers@discuss.tchncs.de
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      24 天前

      Everybody do the flop!

  • dreadbeef@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    25 天前

    i make websites

    • humorlessrepost@lemmy.world
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      25 天前

      Can confirm this works, since fullstack is a real job, but I can’t describe my frontend bullshit in 3 words.

      • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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        25 天前

        try “I break interfaces”

        • humorlessrepost@lemmy.world
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          24 天前

          People still prefer our crap over curl for some reason 🤣

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