Me (13 years old at the time): Dad, Mom’s cheating on you. I saw her making out with this man.

Dad: Listen here, princess. The guy’s filthy rich, and when you have money, it’s normal to have a hot mistress like your mom.

Me: But aren’t you jealous?

Dad: laughs

I was flabbergasted, lmao.

  • Tar_Alcaran@sh.itjust.works
    11·
    8 hours ago

    I once sat a bar, having a drunk chat with a guy, who went from your basic “you know what would fix the world? Fluffier dogs!” type talk into “you straight women have it easy, you never have to control yourself when there’s some sexy 14 year old chick around”.

    I was far too drunk to give him the proper reaction, but I wasn’t nearly too drunk to get the fuck out.