Long story short I have never been successful in dating in any shape or form and it’s starting to really affect my everyday life. I have been in therapy for over 7 years (recently quit) to no avail. I am already on antidepressants which thankfully dampens my libido a bit but I now I want it all the way gone.
So anyway, should I tell my family about this? Nothing will really change if I do, but a part of me is telling they ought to know, you know? But I am not sure if I want to.
I met my fiancee at 31, and I only had one real relationship before that and was single for over 10 years. Just because you’ve been unsuccessful so far doesn’t mean you’re forever alone.
Chemical castration is a pretty extreme reaction. I would suggest you interrogate why you want to do this, like at the deepest levels. Removing your libido won’t keep you from being lonely.
You say you were in therapy for 7 years. What kind? Was it all with the same therapist? Maybe you need a different therapist, or perhaps an actual psychiatrist or psychologist, or to try a different form of therapy. There’s lots of things to try.
You say you’ve been unsuccessful in dating. What does that mean? You’re focusing on your libido, so does that mean you’re having trouble getting sex, specifically? Is that all you’re focused on in dating? If so, maybe you need to change your approach to dating.
I second this.
Are you actually too horny, or could it be that you’re too lonely?
It’s bit a of a personal rabbit hole to get into here in Lemmy. But let’s just say it’s more than just being alone.
I am not lonely, though. I am quite socially active. I have a ton of hobbies (I dance, I climb, I golf, I skateboard, I also go to the gym ALOT, I am also part of a board of a social club) I just don’t want to be attracted to women anymore, basically.
Mostly CBT, but also “regualr” therapy. Three different psychologists.
To but it blankly I am still a virgin. And I feel unlovable. Whether successful or not successful at this point. I feel like I don’t want to have any sort of relationship anymore because I feel like it just won’t give me any salvation.
I get it, it seems like it will never change, but it will. I have a neighbor, a life-long bachelor, met his wife in his late 50s. She had 9 grown kids, and a zillion grandkids. He went from being alone to being part of a tribe, just when he thought his life was setting. That might be more than you’re looking for, but it illustrates the point.
Your life is going to take a series of turns that you can’t predict. Don’t do anything permanent that will limit your future.
Not a doctor, but wouldn’t the procedure also affect your ability to do your hobbies and social activities due to hormones being affected, like muscle loss or whatever? I imagine that will even worsen your situation if it affects other aspects of your life as well.