Nothing, absolutely never going to happen. It has been many, many years and they moved on more easily than me…almost like my going NC did them a favor. My dad passed before Covid, and he was the only one I had a relationship with in adulthood, and I miss him. I have no idea what has become of the rest of my family over the years. I am mostly fine. There’s no use mourning awful people for decades. I do it once or twice a year and that’s more of the mourning an idea of what having a family would be.
I sometimes fanticized about an alternate timeline where my parents were much more lovely.
I mean I do keep trying to remember the moments where I really love spending time with my mom… but unfortunately those memories are far and between… so much of the emotional abuse in between it… so much times where I cried…
I’m just desparately hanging on to those good memories…
I refuse to believe my mom is evil… its as if an alien shapeshifter took her place… the mother I should’ve had…
I sometimes just wish I was born to a Norweigian family… imagine the happiness…
unfortunately… their population is so low… odds of being born there is so miniscule… reincarnation could be a thing, and you can die 100 times and still never make it there. most likely be born in some developing country…
universe so cruel…
welp, its either that or eternal nothingness… which is just also fucking sad… nothing will ever happen again…
I think the best thing you can do is really become independent of your family, from reading other posts. And put some distance between yourself and them. I’m sure if you became successful, they would attempt to financially abuse you if they could. For similar reasons that is why my response to this question is a hard no, never going back.
Good news is you can choose who to surround yourself with in life. It does take a lot of the sting out.
An older friend of mine had early onset Alzheimer’s. Her sister repeatedly asked her for loans knowing full well my friend
couldn’t remember giving her that money after a few days. The sister drained my friend’s retirement account of $110k before we got involved and put a stop to it, and she left my friend with a huge IRS tax bill.
Other friends quickly learned that involving their families in their lives was a very bad idea because there was no situation they couldn’t make worse. They grew up without any family support at all despite having living parents and siblings. Figuring everything out by themselves definitely made their lives much harder.
By contrast some of my neighbors and other friends have wonderful families. They see their family members constantly and really enjoy the time they spend together. Best of all they do everything they can to support each other and it makes all of their lives better.
Towards the end my dad had a chosen family. I met a lot of them ant his funeral, and they were all better than the biological family. He was never alone even when I was thousands of miles away, and that comforts me. The real family? Couldn’t be bothered to leave work at a retail shop while he was dying. The friends? Gave him a home, cared for him, carried him in their arms to the truck/hospital. I think…what it comes down to in general is finding good souls we can surround ourselves with and not letting those other people ruin us. If possible.
Nothing, absolutely never going to happen. It has been many, many years and they moved on more easily than me…almost like my going NC did them a favor. My dad passed before Covid, and he was the only one I had a relationship with in adulthood, and I miss him. I have no idea what has become of the rest of my family over the years. I am mostly fine. There’s no use mourning awful people for decades. I do it once or twice a year and that’s more of the mourning an idea of what having a family would be.
I sometimes fanticized about an alternate timeline where my parents were much more lovely.
I mean I do keep trying to remember the moments where I really love spending time with my mom… but unfortunately those memories are far and between… so much of the emotional abuse in between it… so much times where I cried…
I’m just desparately hanging on to those good memories…
I refuse to believe my mom is evil… its as if an alien shapeshifter took her place… the mother I should’ve had…
I sometimes just wish I was born to a Norweigian family… imagine the happiness…
unfortunately… their population is so low… odds of being born there is so miniscule… reincarnation could be a thing, and you can die 100 times and still never make it there. most likely be born in some developing country…
universe so cruel…
welp, its either that or eternal nothingness… which is just also fucking sad… nothing will ever happen again…
I think the best thing you can do is really become independent of your family, from reading other posts. And put some distance between yourself and them. I’m sure if you became successful, they would attempt to financially abuse you if they could. For similar reasons that is why my response to this question is a hard no, never going back.
Good news is you can choose who to surround yourself with in life. It does take a lot of the sting out.
If infinity exists, you’ll eventually experience every life you’ve ever imagined and many more you can’t.
There will be lives where I never read The Egg by Andy Weir
We are all murderers… and their victims
I use to feel the same way. The older I get the more convinced I am that the only thing worse than having no family is having a family.
There are times it would be convenient. Certainly less lonely. I think it would be worth it for the right people. But not everyone wins that lottery.
An older friend of mine had early onset Alzheimer’s. Her sister repeatedly asked her for loans knowing full well my friend couldn’t remember giving her that money after a few days. The sister drained my friend’s retirement account of $110k before we got involved and put a stop to it, and she left my friend with a huge IRS tax bill.
Other friends quickly learned that involving their families in their lives was a very bad idea because there was no situation they couldn’t make worse. They grew up without any family support at all despite having living parents and siblings. Figuring everything out by themselves definitely made their lives much harder.
By contrast some of my neighbors and other friends have wonderful families. They see their family members constantly and really enjoy the time they spend together. Best of all they do everything they can to support each other and it makes all of their lives better.
You’re right, it’s like winning the lottery.
Towards the end my dad had a chosen family. I met a lot of them ant his funeral, and they were all better than the biological family. He was never alone even when I was thousands of miles away, and that comforts me. The real family? Couldn’t be bothered to leave work at a retail shop while he was dying. The friends? Gave him a home, cared for him, carried him in their arms to the truck/hospital. I think…what it comes down to in general is finding good souls we can surround ourselves with and not letting those other people ruin us. If possible.