Eat the floor, easy.

How clean is the ground? How wet is the food? These are the questions.

I am now holding 2 wriggly cats which teleported into the mess to try and clean the floor with their tongues.

i once dropped an entire rotisserie chicken on the floor. better believe i rinsed and ate that mf

“Happy birthday to the ground!”

too many variables not addressed.

Extremely situational. Soup? Fug. Pizza but not topping side down on kitchen floor? Brush it off.

Pick it up, dust it off, eat.

Depends on if it is messy.

Unbuttered toast might just get a brushing off before I eat it.

Lasagna will get scraped up and tossed.

My first thought when accidents happen is always “How do I make it so that this didn’t happen?”

I know this is an irrational thought, but you asked. It’s probably from using computers where “undo” is commonplace. (And much missed, often with horror, when it isn’t).

For dry foods, anything that didn’t touch the floor is examined closely and then put back on a fresh plate. Or the same plate after a quick rinse and paper towel dry. The rest would be tossed with heavy heart.

Wetter foods get similar treatment, but there’s more floor cleaning required. That would be done immediately, and any rescued hot food that had cooled in the meantime would get a quick re-warming in the microwave.

Either way, I would be cursing silently the whole time, and I wouldn’t enjoy my meal, but I’d still eat what, if anything, I saved.

… sometimes I will eat escaped dry cereal when pouring from box to bowl just to spite it, even if it ends up on the floor, but it has to look immaculate for me to do that. Anything vaguely oily or sticky doesn’t qualify for this, even if it looks fine.

One mississippi… two mississippi… three mississippi…

Good as new!

Food drops to the ground

Me: “AGAIN!? Ah well, that’s typical, just my luck.”

Starts picking it up and eating anyway with a bare minimum of cleaning said food, just like a dog

I unzip, then I start thinking about moths.

Clean it up and get another serving.