For my birthday, my spouse got me a nicer newer expensive version of a thing I already have. The one I have is older and dented but works just fine. I use it weekly. I never complain about it. I’ve never asked for a newer one. The one I have was given to me by my mother in law, whom I adore. It’s sentimental.

I don’t like new things. When they got me a 3d printer, it was the cheapest one and it was a kit and I had to build myself. I loved it. It’s perfect for me. I regularly buy things used or get things from Buy Nothing groups. I much prefer to repair old things in many ways. My car has over 100k miles. The one before did too. I don’t like new things.

We got into a huge argument because I want to return it. They are so upset with me that they left the house to calm down. Why am I the bad person? Why are they mad at me? I have a very clear tendency for old broken used things. Why am I obligated to like this new thing?

We literally established a rule early in our marriage. I’m not allowed to gift nerdy t shirts. They don’t like them. I love them. I thought they would like them but they do not. So they asked me to stop. This feels the same. I do not like new things. Why am I the bad guy for wanting to return the newer version of the thing I already have?

  • naught101@lemmy.world
    58·
    1 day ago

    Nah, that’s nonsense. Sounds like the old one was sufficient, and had deeper meaning attached to it.

    • khannie@lemmy.worldEnglish
      9·
      1 day ago

      That’s true, but I don’t think that negates what was good intent. Plus we have no idea about delivery of the message from OP.

      • naught101@lemmy.world
        2·
        1 day ago

        Agree, and I said as much in a separate comment. We also don’t know anything about the delivery of the gift giver, either though…

        • khannie@lemmy.worldEnglish
          3·
          1 day ago

          True. I guess good intent and delivery is generally assumed with a gift but not always there. It’s not implied in the post though.

          There’s a lot of important context missing but on balance, with the bits we do have, I think OP probably could have handled it with more sensitivity.

    • Gerudo@lemmy.zip
      2·
      1 day ago

      I didn’t catch any deeper meaning other than “it worked for what I needed”.

      • naught101@lemmy.world
        3·
        1 day ago

        "The one I have was given to me by my mother in law, whom I adore. It’s sentimental. … it was a kit and I had to build myself. I loved it. It’s perfect for me. "

        It’s right there in the OP

          • naught101@lemmy.world
            1·
            1 day ago

            I think OP is saying that they have an old 3d printer that they made/love, and their spouse got them a new (better, nicer looking, but less sentimental) 3d printer.