I have this online female friend and we have been friends for almost 4 years now. We met in an online game. She’s the one who asked my social media ID so we can play together. And she seems to have done to a lot of people as well. So she was kinda collecting a lot of friends. Have seen people get nto her lobbies and say “Thank you so much for listening to me the other day,” “You are really a kind person” and so on. There was this one guy used to address her as his “bi*ch”. At this I thought they were a couple but apparently they met on the game and known eachother for only a few months and were just friends.

She used to text me first whenever she was about to play. And used to check on me if I hadn’t appeared on the game for a week or two.

Later we got close. I stopped gaming but she still plays other games. But after I got close, she stopped texting me first. Only would chat with me if I texted her first. I asked her why she never texts me about anything. She goes “Uhh I am not that type to text people first” “I never do that to anyone” “I think you’re just busy” and so on.

So all this weird behaviour had me thinking why she is doing all this? What are her motives? What kind of person is she?

I did ask her these questions many times but only got vague answers. She also never gives anything about her other online friends and usually becomes defensive when I bring them up in a conversation.

    • unmagical@lemmy.ml
      152·
      10 hours ago

      females

      Did you mean “women?”

      females

      Perhaps you meant “women?”

      female

      Pretty sure you actually meant “woman.”

      No issue, no awkward moment, no creepiness nothing.

      You sure about that? Your disdain, misunderstanding, and disregard for women in general was on full display in this one post. Its entirely possible that within 2 days of conversation the woman you were talking with realized you weren’t the kind of person she wanted in her life.

        • unmagical@lemmy.ml
          31·
          15 hours ago

          Your in-group language may be viewed as acceptable within your siloed communications, but that doesn’t mean it’s generally appropriate. “Female” is an adjective, and we already have an appropriate word in English for a female person, “woman.”

          The use of “female” as a noun is objectifying and dehumanizing–reflecting terminology generally reserved for describing other animals.

          I’d encourage you to ask some women how they feel about the term and take their responses to heart, but apparently you can’t keep their attention for more than 2 days.

          Oh, and who you calling “you people?”

    • hisao@ani.socialEnglish
      2·
      17 hours ago

      one of those females that once they have your attention they play hard to get

      Might be a thing, but your choice of words is bold, to say the least. I wish there was a way to tell if they “want to be chased” or are sincerely uninterested, because I really don’t want to bother people who dislike me, and the way you say it (“chase”) adds a bit of predatory vibe to it, which, if everyone is interested, can be hot actually, but if not, it multiplies the creepiness.

    • immathrowawayig@sh.itjust.worksOP
      112·
      18 hours ago

      Really she does feels like this type. They poke for our attention and once they get it, they want us to chase them from there on. But I kept giving her benefit of doubt all these years. I have tried separating many times too but couldn’t do it cuz she became my only friend I was close with. And she still is my only close friend who knows me deeply.

      Maybe I should try picking up a hobby or something. Let’s see.