[edit: I thank everyone for their comments and time. A lot of very interesting opinions and view points. Unfortunately also a lot of things that went away from the actual answer. So I’m thinking maybe this thread can be closed without deleting it?]
The more I hear people talk about it who aren’t cis-het men, the more I hear criticism about the concept. But so far, I’ve only heard people say that it’s stupid, that it’s not a thing, that it’s men’s own fault etc. But I’ve yet to understand where that criticism comes from. I don’t want to start a discussion on whether or not it’s real or not. I just want to understand where the critics are coming from.
I really don’t think age has much to do with it. I’m finding it easier in my 30s than my 20s since people are more adult and less likely to play stupid games
speak for yourself. my experience is it’s way harder and people are way more stupid and judgemental. nobody cared what car i drove. now people find out I ‘only’ own a Honda and they want nothing to do with me anymore because i am ‘not doing well in life’ if i don’t own luxury car.
At some point, I got quite some worried/pitiful look because i didn’t own a car but only a (non-motorized) bike. People are weird!
In the other hand, I got along with people wanting to make our own “bike gang”, aka commuting to work together.
It doesn’t sound like you’re surrounding yourself with the best people. They sound quite superficial if all they care about is perceived status