• Senal@programming.dev
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    3 months ago

    So, two things unrelated to the actual topic being discussed.

    I’ll pretend your choice of words isn’t low-key confrontational and dismissive like every other comment on this site

    It’s entirely possible to be correct and do it in such a way that invites confrontation and dismissal.

    If it seems like everyone apart from you is confrontational and dismissive, perhaps it’s time to consider additional perspectives on why that might be happening.

    • Lemminary@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      It doesn’t escape me, but what part of what I’ve said has invited confrontation or dismissal? I’m asking honestly. It’s grating that it keeps happening and I keep telling people to stop. Hyperbole aside, it’s frequent enough that I can see a pattern of people starting petty arguments trying to win and throwing low punches instead of clarifying what is being said and why. Like, I don’t even want to argue.

      additional perspectives on why that might be happening

      Meaning what, it’s also me? lol If I’m the one telling people to stop and act like adults and that gets 180° turns in behavior, what does that say to you?

      • sh__@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        It’s kind of baffling they are arguing exposing their cat to drugs is fine, for what? They can’t know that’s safe. Why take the risk? Might as well let them drink some wine while we are at it eh?

        They are arguing on emotion more than anything. Nothing to do about that.

        • EleventhHour@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          I didn’t argue any of those things. But go ahead and put words in my mouth since it appears to make you feel validated.

          • sh__@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            So you think exposing your cat to drugs isn’t fine? You said you do just that though, so I would like if you clarified the difference. The last point of the wine was not your words, but my own. I will own that. I will ask the simple question, why do you choose to expose your cat to cannabis?

            • EleventhHour@lemmy.world
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              3 months ago

              you’re clearly here to pick a fight and troll, and i’m not going to enable your childish behavior.

              i suggest you take it easy on the wine.

              • sh__@lemmy.world
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                3 months ago

                I don’t drink alcohol. I do want to know your reasoning though. I do want an answer to the question before. The reason I came off strong is because I admit that I found it irresponsible what you claimed to do. I can’t understand the risk benefit analysis that would lead you to decide it’s worth it. I want to understand your reasoning.

      • Senal@programming.dev
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        3 months ago

        It doesn’t escape me, but what part of what I’ve said has invited confrontation or dismissal? I’m asking honestly.

        In this case i can’t see any big red flags.

        The tone is a possibility, as i said, being correct isn’t an absolute defence against being considered an arsehole.

        To be clear, I’m not implying you were incorrect, or the tone was incorrect, just that that kind of certainty (evidence based or not) gets some people’s backs up.

        It’s grating that it keeps happening and I keep telling people to stop.

        I don’t think it’s what you actually meant but this could be interpreted as “Somebody didn’t accept my answer and argued, so i told them to stop, they didn’t even though i was clearly correct, this is grating”

        Hyperbole aside, it’s frequent enough that I can see a pattern of people starting petty arguments trying to win and throwing low punches instead of clarifying what is being said and why.

        Firstly, welcome to public internet forums in general, this is common behaviour.

        That aside, there are numerous trolls and bad faith “debaters” around, but just because you consider something petty doesn’t mean the other person does.

        This is what i was trying to convey in my reply earlier, if almost all interactions end up with what you consider petty behaviour it’s worth considering the possibility that you are contributing to that outcome somehow.

        Like, I don’t even want to argue.

        So don’t, if you don’t want to continue the interaction then don’t reply.

        Meaning what, it’s also me?

        Possibly, yes.

        lol If I’m the one telling people to stop and act like adults and that gets 180° turns in behaviour, what does that say to you?

        Honestly, it says to me that your communication skills might need some work.

        Again, to be clear i don’t mean your communication of facts and information, i mean your ability to understand how phrasing something in a certain way might illicit a certain kind of response.

        “Stop acting like a child” is a very good way to build enmity and confrontation, which is useful in some cases, if you intend to illicit that response.

        However, saying something like that and then being confused/frustrated when people get confrontational and dismissive suggests a lack of understanding about the impact of tone and phrasing.

        • Lemminary@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          I see. I don’t agree with everything but I’ll think about it. Sincerely, thanks for the feedback.

    • Ledivin@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      If it seems like everyone apart from you is confrontational and dismissive, perhaps it’s time to consider additional perspectives on why that might be happening.

      Because stoners are basically a cult at this point, and refuse anything even as remotely negative as “it’s not good for your cats?”

      To be clear, I smoke most nights… but god damn do I hate people who feel the need to defend weed against everything. It’s a drug, y’all. It’s not good for you.

      • Senal@programming.dev
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        3 months ago

        Because stoners are basically a cult at this point, and refuse anything even as remotely negative as “it’s not good for your cats?”

        I mean, i specifically stated it wasn’t related to the actual topic being discussed, but i can address this anyway i suppose.

        Possibly culty i suppose, about the same amount as alcohol consumers, smokers, people who see chiropractors etc.

        Less than people in organised religion ( big cults ), actual cults and MLM schemes.

        If all of the stoners you know are your definition of culty ( except you of course ), perhaps consider that it’s your choice in acquaintances rather than an entire demographic.

        Can’t say i care either way, but i’d be interested in any studies you might have on the subject ( belief systems of stoners in general, not specifically the ones you know ofc, that would be unlikely )

        To be clear, I smoke most nights… but god damn do I hate people who feel the need to defend weed against everything.

        If that personal preference works for you, who am i to tell you you’re wrong.

        It’s a drug, y’all. It’s not good for you.

        Drug doesn’t automatically imply harm, but i think i know what you mean.