Relevant Mitchell and Webb comedy sketch.

Is that “two-thirds of the people left behind, each in one piece” or “two-thirds of the scattered remains of each victim”? Because those are very different problems.

🎵🎵

Midnight, not a sound from the pavement

Has the moon lost her memory?

She is smiling alone…

🎵🎵

You can always build your own out of LEGO.

That reminds me of this guide to roundabouts and also protecting your car from supermaneuverable fighter aircraft.

Didn’t Discord just leak a few million “age-verification photos” that they sorta promised to delete, but didn’t?

It’s a bread knife.

Imagine a large rock, suspended by helicopters a few miles up in the air.

Now drop the rock. How fast is it going when it hits the ground?

The same thing is true for a rock falling from space, but more so. Regardless of initial conditions: if it ever contacts the ground, it will be moving at least 11 kilometers per second.

But why is the background mirrored? All of the text is backwards.

Doesn’t Saturn also have cats?

I AM KENOUGH
I AM KENOUGH
I AM KENOUGH
I AM KENOUGH

Weak. You want to stop a train quickly, just suplex it.

“ROCK AND STONE FOREVER!”

“Did I hear a rock and stone?”

Thanks, I hate it. One more set of batteries, one more flaky wireless link to troubleshoot. Please take all those fancy electronics, and put them inside the phone where they belong.

Where do you plug in your headphones?

“Whosoever holds this screwdriver, if they be worthy, shall possess the power of Thor.” -Odin, probably

Can confirm. I once had a letter opener made to look like a tiny katana, with a scabbard and everything. It was fucking awesome.

Who could have predicted that hanging ten conflicting kernel-level anti-cheat installations might cause compatibility problems?

Yes, they were organic dyes. At the time, those were the only kind. Maybe it’s gotten better over the years.