

For XMPP I my favourite messenger is “Monocles” because it is the most advanced and on Linux it is “Dino” for the same reason. “Movim” (a web client) has a nice touch to it by having a small microblog added to it but it doesn’t support encryption so not something I’d use for important stuff. “Kaidan” is another promising Desktop client but it doesn’t have encryption and group chats yet.
For Matrix I use FluffyChat & Commet on Android and Cinny & Commet on Desktop. FluffyChat is kept in a more traditional messenger layout whilst Cinny and especially Commet take inspiration from Discord. The backside of Commet is that it can be laggy/buggy due to being in an alpha version state but overall for me it is useable whilst Cinny is more stable but doesn’t have voice chat yet. (all other previous examples - XMPP examples included - have at least some form of voice chat even if some only have 1 to 1 calls or have hid the feature as “experimental” in the settings (FluffyChat)).
Other examples I’d like to mention are Nheko since it is liked by some peops I chat with and even Element/Schildi are worth mentioning since they technically offer the most features and aim for a more Slack like appearance. But they are also the solution that get’s pumped with money from their “partners”.
Tl;Dr:
XMPP Android: Monocles
XMPP Linux: Dino
Matrix Android: FluffyChat, Commet
Matrix Desktop: Cinny, Commet
Commet aims to mimic Discord but is in an alpha state so bugs/lags are to be expected - tho I’d say it is useable.
I did not try iOS/macOS bc I don’t own an iPhone/mac



It is feature wise but it is an alpha so lags & bugs are there but it was useable for me and seems promising.