Bald for Bieber

Thank you for the link. It’s as if that article was spying on my wife, and I’ll share it with her when she wakes. Happy Tuesday!

David Steven Cohen, the head writer, died recently on 15-Mar-2025.

Stop twiddling your thumb

They’re not wrong. It’s feeling like Jaden Smith posting.

Shithead

First, I’ll abolish your milk
Then, I shall abolish your VIRGINITY

Hi all! Referencing rule 2 “the entire showerthought should be in the title” I think this one warrants removal but I hate to wipe out good faith interaction in the comments, so I’m locking instead. Please consider resubmitting with a more concise/compliant title, or not. Peace.

And until they behave like nazis, you’d defer to the friendly warning, correct?

Seems to be 1 player. Too bad, it’d make an awesome 2 player.

Union Dixie

Seconded Party in the CIA!

Sounds like Homestar Runner

My man

My congressman with an infamous Christmas card ran unopposed in 2024.

Looks like I’M running against him in 2026.

AND HOW IS IT NOW, FUKKFACE??? (I am totally joking, peace)

6th grade computer class. I grew up playing video games and liked medieval era stuff despite not knowing how to spell it, so I thought I’d try to type “midevil(dot)com” into the URL bar. At the time it was some kind of BDSM site with a black background, red font, and multiple cats-o-nine-tails slapping to and fro like animated gifs (were they gifs? idk). My blood ran cold and I closed the window. I wasn’t caught thanks to the teacher also not knowing that browser history was a thing.

I appreciate this in a setting with a good teacher (not that yours was good). A couple teachers of mine had such poorly behaved classes that their faces looked defeated. If one kid speaks up it could help that teacher feel less outnumbered.

On the flip side - I scold my son for doing the same thing to his younger brother. The difference is they’re being loud at 5:30am while their parents and infant sibling are asleep, and they rob us of the last hour of sleep.

5th grade music (singing) class. We’re practicing a song for an upcoming assembly. It’s cheesy. An excerpt:

We can fight all the evil, we can fight all the hate
If we do it together, it won’t be too late
If we do it together, it won’t be too late

During the song, two adjacent kids start laughing every time it says “We can do it together” because “do it” = “have sex” even though most of us don’t know what it entails at this age, myself included. The teacher glares at them but does nothing else. Several other kids including me chuckle at the scene. This goes on for 3 weeks.

Now comes the dress rehearsal. Today is special because two 5th grade classes are having a joint rehearsal. All of us are a little giddy because there are double the kids crammed into the same space.

In anticipation of getting caught up in the infectious laughter, as the words “do it” approach I hide my face behind my sheet music. Suddenly, the backing CD track cuts out. I lowered the paper from my face she was already halfway to the clown kid sitting beside me. Except… she comes to me. In this abrupt silence she explodes at me, point blank, index finger brandished:

“YOU NEED TO GROW UP! IT IS NOT ABOUT HAVING SEX!”

She singled me out. I was embarrassed.

Only after class did I learn from my homeroom teacher that the two instigators had recently been given a very stern talking to, such that the music teacher thought it was resolved until my hiding face gave her the impression it was not. Thankfully my homeroom teacher understood and I received no further consequences other than all of this living in my head for the next 30 years and forever.