That wasn’t squirting. That was a gusher. I doubt he even knew what happened. His hands instantly clenched. Immediate access to the machine elves.

Didn’t some woman shoot up Google headquarters because of some age verification process on YouTube where she specifically made makeup videos geared toward children and lost all her revenue or subscribers?

Are you sure that is not early stages of Beech Bark Disease?
https://c8.alamy.com/comp/C7KWNB/beech-bark-disease-on-american-beech-tree-fagus-grandifolia-in-the-C7KWNB.jpg