• 0 Posts
  • 243 Comments
Joined 2 years ago
Cake day: July 27th, 2023
  • Hacksaw@lemmy.catoLemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world•FACTS
    15·
    3 days ago

    But he previously said “Sex is for making children. Any man who has sex with women because it ‘feels good’ is gay”… So that doesn’t seem to match with him saying you’re supposed to have sex with many women for fun… What the hell is he saying!!!

  • Hacksaw@lemmy.catoAsk Lemmy@lemmy.world•Why is socialization so hard in the 2020s?
    51·
    5 days ago

    If you’re looking for inclusive spiritual community you can look for Unitarian Universalist congregations. They’re all over Europe and North America. They’re based on progressive values instead of Scripture so you bring your own deity/pantheon/no deity. They’re basically a spiritual community for the left from Pagans to Christians/Jews/Muslims to atheists and agnostics and everyone else.

    In my area there are a lot of ageing hippies and a lot of millennials and Gen Z looking for community for their children which is a delightful mix. Lots of LGBTQ+ representation as well.

    Could be a useful place to look!

  • Hacksaw@lemmy.catoAsk Lemmy@lemmy.world•Please help me under stand my spouse's gift and their hurt
    5·
    13 days ago

    Fundamentally this gift is replacing something that has sentimental value to OP. That’s not usually a desirable gift. If someone got you a gift that replaced your favorite [thing] in a way that replaces it you wouldn’t want it either.

    Cheerfully accepting a gift you don’t like is dishonest. Other replies have great honest and tactful ways to accept or reject a gift you don’t like. Op’s approach was hurtful to their partner which isn’t great.

    Returning a gift is normal, that’s why stores issue gift receipts. However, it is a situation that requires tact since it’s easy to hurt someone if done poorly.

    In the long term, it should be easy for you and your partner to do something special for each other where no one has to fake enjoyment. In OP’s case, effort spent communicating now will bring a lot of enjoyment in the future and save a lot of pain.

  • Hacksaw@lemmy.catoAsk Lemmy@lemmy.world•Please help me under stand my spouse's gift and their hurt
    17·
    13 days ago

    Nobody is a bad person here and both of your feelings are valid.

    As others pointed out, your partner likely put significant effort into the gift and is hurt that the effort was in vain. Compounding that is the fact that you didn’t seem to acknowledge their effort or treat their hurt as valid.

    Your hurt is valid. You got given something you don’t want and now you feel pressured to accept it to appease your partner. It’s in certain ways worse than getting nothing.

    The situation sucks and you’ll both be hurt regardless of how you resolve it.

    It’s probably going to be very important for you two to work out gifts or gift giving occasions. What do you like to do, for yourself or with your partner. Maybe the answer to that question can be part of the solution.

    For the time being you have a few options. You can keep the gift like the others have said, maybe as a backup. Or you can return it. I suggest that if you return it you spend the money on something you both enjoy, maybe a nice date to sooth the hurt.

    Let your partner know that you appreciate the effort that went into this gift. Let them know that you know you’re a hard person to buy for, especially because you’re not very consumerist which means that the things typically for sale won’t appeal to you. Let them know that it’s important for you that you’re both able to express love towards each other and that you want to make sure that the next time your partner expends significant effort for you that they’re able to create a situation which is rewarding for the both of you.

    Then sort out what you’re going to do with this gift. Maybe explain your feelings about using the old device and how the new one can’t do that for you.

    Then make a plan to work out the line term goal of how you’ll give each other gifts/experiences in the future. And actually do it. It might be a lot of work, but it will probably create a lot of joy in your relationship in the long run where there might have been even more pain.

  • Hacksaw@lemmy.catoLemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world•Insuranace is a joke
    4·
    2 months ago

    The minimum liability insurance isn’t a scam. If you hit someone and cripple them you’ll be glad for insurance to pay their medical etc…

    Comprehensive is absolutely a scam. Just take the money and save it, maybe buy some bonds. Then when it’s time to buy a new car (or when you get your car totaled) you’re already half way to a new car.

  • Hacksaw@lemmy.catoTechnology@beehaw.org•Elon Musk is trying to silence Microsoft employees who criticize Charlie Kirk
    7·
    3 months ago

    I think that free speech laws are what stopped us from being proactive against these intolerant fascist views.

    They turn tolerance from a social contract into a “paradox” where we have to tolerate the intolerant until they take over.

    If we didn’t have such strict free speech laws, we could have deplatformed and jailed these people back when they were at the “protest with confederate and Nazi flags” stage and not had to deal with the neo-fascist government stage.

    To put it another way punching Nazis should be legal. A Nazi is a direct existential threat to Jewish people and other minorities. Parading with Nazi paraphernalia in public is violence towards others and punching Nazis is valid self defense. American free speech and self defense laws were written to exclude “inducement” of violence, but that’s been whittled away by the supreme Court, including a ruling that walking around with Nazi flags in a Jewish neighborhood wasn’t bad enough to permit the residents to retaliate in any way because of “free speech”.