I was thinking phrasing the question explicitly for nurses, doctors, emergency services and the like but anyone could offer solid advice.
I’ve realized I don’t know how to react if people start crying on me for something as innocuous as asking how they’re doing or how their operation went. Others are terrified of their operation and start shaking like a leaf.
The most I can offer are platitudes, a therapist, a priest, volunteers that come to talk to those who feel lonely, something to calm down if the anesthesiologist agrees and hold their hand but I simply don’t know what to tell them to calm them down.
How do you do it?
I not an expert in this, but I work with patients who often need help calming down. In the beginning I tried to say a lot of things, offering a different perspective or trying to fix a problem. But now I just try to be there and listen. And not try to fill the silence. Sometimes a calming hand on the shoulder helps, sometimes not. Affirm the feeling and don’t argue facts. Last week a patient was upset because she was hallucinating an injured angry dog outside. Instead of telling her she’s wrong, I can only say that I myself cannot see a dog, but it sounds scary, and that she’s safe here. Another patient said she wanted to die. I think I just said “is that how you feel?” and so but the important part is to be there, just being, without rushing, letting someone feel seen and heard.