Don’t Download This Song

Once in awhile, maybe you will feel the urge 
To break international copyright law 
By downloading MP3s from file-sharing sites 
Like Morpheus, or Grokster, or LimeWire, or Kazaa 
But deep in your heart, you know the guilt would drive you mad 
And the shame would leave a permanent scar 
'Cause you start out stealing songs, then you’re robbing liquor stores 
And selling crack and running over school kids with your car!

So don’t download this song 
The record store’s where you belong 
Go and buy the CD like you know that you should 
Oh, don’t download this song!

Oh, you don’t want to mess with the R-I-double-A 
They’ll sue you if you burn that CD-R 
It doesn’t matter if you’re a grandma or a seven-year-old girl 
They’ll treat you like the evil, hard bitten, criminal scum you are!

So don’t download this song 
Don’t go pirating music all day long 
Go and buy the CD like you know that you should 
Oh, don’t download this song!

Don’t take away money 
From artists just like me 
How else can I afford another solid gold Humvee? 
And diamond-studded swimming pools 
These things don’t grow on trees 
So all I ask is everybody please…

Don’t download this song (don’t do it, no, no) 
Even Lars Ulrich knows it’s wrong (you can just ask him) 
Go and buy the CD like you know that you should (you really should) 
Oh, don’t download this song!

Don’t download this song (oh, please don’t you do it or you) 
Might wind up in jail like Tommy Chong (remember Tommy) 
Go and buy the CD (right now) 
Like you know that you should (go out and buy it) 
Oh, don’t download this song 
Don’t download this song (no, no, no, no, no, no) 
Or you’ll burn in hell before too long (and you deserve it) 
Go and buy the CD (just buy it) 
Like you know that you should (you cheap bastard)!