Your local bi(polar) schizo fluffernutter.

Previous profile under the same name over at lemmy.one

  • 5 Posts
  • 130 Comments
Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: December 30th, 2023

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  • As a trans woman who came out the other side… well there’s no modest way to put it- pretty damn attractive I’m told, I never understood why women just assume guys are hitting on them until I lived it.
    I don’t even do it on purpose. It’s just that the vast, vast majority of the time, guys are trying to hit on me, and my brain has connected the “guy talking to me” neuron and the “guy hitting on me” neuron so tightly that it doesn’t even occur to me that they might not be unless they prove it through extended interactions, usually over years, of never showing any interest.
    And yeah, I’ve definitely fallen for people largely because they simply hadn’t shown any signs of being into me. You’re right that there is an immense sense of safety in knowing they’ve never tried to get in my pants. Unfortunately, that also means, 99% of the time, that they’re gonna say no if I ask them out (I generally prefer to make the first move because it feels safer.)

    For the sake of example and because it’s relevant to the thread, I asked a dude out who’d shown no interest, and it turned out he was actually attracted to me, but wasn’t interested because he’d been heavily abused in a past relationship and he wasn’t ever willing to give it another shot.

    And on that subject, having life experience as both a man and a woman really does open your mind to how differently abuse is treated between men and women. I was heavily abused as a kid, both by men and women, and telling the story before I transitioned, people always desperately searched for a reason it was my fault (even though I was a kid at the time it happened) and when they couldn’t find one, spouted lines like “at least you’re stronger for it.”
    As a woman, people, not having knowledge that I wasn’t always a woman, immediately recognize how horrible my abuse was, zero attempts to justify it, and hell, even direct me to support groups (albiet I’ve attended said groups before and they’re fucking useless trauma feedback circles in my experience.)

    Well, that turned into a half irrelevant rant, but it’s nice to have some of that off my chest.









  • Sombyr@lemmy.zipto196@lemmy.blahaj.zoneCorn rule
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    7 months ago

    Fortunately, I think you’d probably notice if you did. Makes it hella hard to swallow stuff unless you pulverize it to a paste. In my case, some days I can’t even swallow things as simple as applesauce and have to just drink high calorie liquids.

    Edit: After seeing the rest of your comments in this thread… Yeah, sounds like dysphagia. Dysphagia is a symptom though, not the condition itself. If you’ve got it, something deeper is wrong. In my case it’s likely nerve damage and allergies together.


  • Sombyr@lemmy.zipto196@lemmy.blahaj.zoneCorn rule
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    7 months ago

    Disclaimer, I have dysphagia, so this isn’t meant to be the average person’s experience, but… I was eating when I read this and counted how many times I chewed when I took a bite until I felt comfortable swallowing and it was 47. You’re telling me normal people can chew as low as 2 times? Astounding.




  • Sombyr@lemmy.zipto196@lemmy.blahaj.zonebe flipping for rule
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    8 months ago

    My school unironically thought this. I was left handed as a kid, but I wasn’t allowed to write, draw, or really do anything with my left hand while at school, even during breaks. Nowadays as a result I can only do things with my right hand even though I still, every single time, naturally go for my left.
    I constantly go to write or draw and go “why is this so hard?” only to realize I instinctively used my left hand instead of my right.


  • Sombyr@lemmy.zipto196@lemmy.blahaj.zoneAbuse is abuse rule
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    8 months ago

    Really applies to most things. I’m not a dude, trans woman, but I’ve gotten sexually harassed a lot both pre and post transition and the response I got pre and post transition is night and day. Pretransition people treated me like I was crazy for feeling unsafe and like I was supposed to enjoy it.
    Honestly, men should be allowed to feel unsafe around women, or really allowed to feel unsafe in general, and be taken seriously for it.


  • Absolutely fuming, because the SSA decided I owe them a shitload of money because I went over the disability resource limit… And it appears based on the dates they claim to be because of payments they gave me. Payments which did not count as a resource for the months that they claim I owe them for.
    So now I gotta go through the bullshit appeal process and just hope they admit their mistake so I don’t have to take it to actual court, which, like, I’m disabled. I can barely leave the house as it is. How the hell am I expected to manage that?

    But in brighter news, my long distance girlfriend got a VR headset so she can cuddle with me even with an ocean between us. That’s brightened my week a lot in spite of everything.



  • As somebody in my mid twenties, I primarily date people in their 30s for this exact reason. I need somebody mature with their shit a little more figured out. Dating people my own age can be fun, but they don’t really have the maturity required to deal with somebody who’s gone through as much trauma and mental illness as I have.

    Case in point, my longest lasting relationship with somebody within 5 years of my age was 1 month long. My shortest lasting relationship with somebody older than me by more than that was 2 years.